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Fourth and Twenty
Fourth and Twenty, '''also entitled 4th and Twenty,' is the fifth chapter of Red vs. Blue: Revelation, as well as the 158th episode of the series. Characters Red Team *Sarge *Grif *Simmons Blue Team *Caboose *Tucker *Epsilon Other *Smith *Aliens Plot An angry mob of Aliens forces Caboose to take the high ground, as they believe he took Church away. Tucker watches with glee, and when Sarge comes, Tucker convinces the mob that Sarge has Epsilon-Church. Sarge leads them to where Grif, Simmons, and Epsilon-Church were. He warns them that he was bringing an angry alien mob with him but as they realize, Epsilon-Church regains consciousness. Despite Grif telling Church to be quiet, he asks what happened and Grif has no choice but to kick Church across the desert to ensure the aliens don't find him. When the aliens arrive, they see that the Reds ''don't have Church, and they turn back to Caboose (who flees) and Tucker, who agrees to get up on the high ground. The Reds, and Caboose, find Epsilon-Church's body landed outside the desert beacons, right in the middle of the mine field from Recreation. Simmons arrives and asks why they don't retrieve Church, but instead of informing him they encourage him to retrieve him himself. He then walks forward but is stopped by an exploding mine. Simmons asks if his team knew, and Caboose says that "yeah, kinda". Transcript Fade in to Caboose standing on top of a tall rock, being harassed on by some aliens below. Tucker is standing off to the side Caboose: Go away, bad aliens! Shoo aliens shoo! Rolled up newspaper! Tucker: Maybe you should have thought about that before you lost their all-powerful Deity. Caboose: '''I didn't lose him, he left. Or maybe he lost himself. Or maybe the Reds took him. '''Caboose: I don't- One of the aliens shoots Caboose Caboose: '''Ow! Stop that! '''Tucker: Well, until the Reds come back, they need somebody to blame. Better you than me man. Caboose: Tucker, help me. Tucker: Hyeah, dude, I don't know. I don't really wanna get in between an angry mob and their religious iconography. And I should know, I used to date an Italian girl. Caboose: But he's not really a god, it's all made up. You know that. The aliens turn toward Tucker Tucker: Whoa dude, I don't know shit. That sounds like straight up blasphemy. You guys gonna put up with this shit? Alien: Blarg. Tucker: H-I know dude, that's what I'm saying. Took the blarg right out of my mouth. Caboose: Tucker? They're going to eat me! Tucker: Caboose shut the fuck up, they're not gonna eat you. They're just gonna persecute you and kill you, stop being such a baby. Caboose: Look, the Reds, they're back. And they have your worshippy guy. Tucker: What? Sarge... Sarge: Hey Blue, we're back. Got Simmons too. Where's the water can? Oh also you got any more spare jeeps around here? I don't wanna get into it, but we've identified a tactical weakness in the hood of the current models. Oh uh, what're you guys doing? Killin' Caboose? That's cool. Caboose: There he is! He is the one who took Church! Get him. Alien: Rawr? Rawrar. Sarge: Ruh-roh. Cut to Grif and Simmons with Church Grif: '''How's Floaty McGee? '''Simmons: Eh you know, same old. Still not working. Grif: '''Is he dead? '''Simmons: '''How the fuck would I know? And even if he was, would it make a difference with this guy? '''Grif: '''Meh, probably not. '''Simmons: Now we've got sand all in his ports. How'm I supposed to fix him in an environment like this? Grif: Sounds like you have sand in your ports. Simmons: '''Why did we even come here, it's a fucking desert. '''Grif: I don't know. This is where we were before we came to get you. And where else can we go anyway? There's bad guys at our base and Sarge never wants us to get far from the Blues. I don't know if you've noticed this Simmons, but he's a little obsessed. He still wants to get 'em back in the database so we can kill 'em. How's that goin' by the way? Any progress? Simmons: '''Progress? '''Grif: It's your project. Simmons: '''I was held captive. '''Grif: Whatever dude. If Sarge takes that as an excuse for not getting work done let me know. I'll get captured all the time. Sarge: Nope. They're right around this corner up here. Grif and Simmons, right up here, where we're walking. Grif: Uh oh, here he comes. You're about to get busted. Sarge: And you'll see when we get around this corner up here, we don't have any kind of floating device. No balls or spheres or anything. Simmons: '''Who's he talking to? '''Sarge: '''You'll see, big group of aliens. We don't have anything like that at all. '''Grif: What? Uh oh. Church begins to turn on Church: '''Whah? Where am I? '''Grif: '''Sshhh, dude shut up. Be quiet. '''Church: '''No, what- '''Grif: '''Shut your hole. '''Church: What's happening, how did I get here? Grif: '''Oh shit! Ub-uh duh- '''Church: Don't do it you fucker- Grif then punts Church behind them. Church: -rrrrrrrrrrr! Simmons: What're you doing? Grif: Shut up man, be cool. Simmons: 'Be cool? ''Sarge then arrives with the aliens. '''Simmons: Whoa! I mean, what's the four-one-one, daddy-o's? Me and my homey were just, hangin' all up in here. Deserts-ville. 'S'all good. You know what I'm sayin', scrillas? Grif: What the fuck are you doing? Simmons: '''You told me to be cool. '''Grif: '''Right. So what the fuck are you doing? '''Sarge: '''As you can see, we don't have your stupid rolley baloney. It's just this yellow guy, and- M.C. Fonzerella over here. '''Simmons: Whatevs, y'all. You don't know me. Tucker: Nahaha, gotcha! See, I knew they would have it. Caboose: Uh, I don't see him- oh my God he's invisible. Tucker: Alright Reds, what did you do with- Tucker turns to see reds fleeing. Sarge: Book it, quadruple-time! Tucker: It. Dammit! I should have seen that coming. Well Caboose, I guess we're on our- Tucker turns to see Caboose fleeing. Tucker: Own. Dammit. Caboose: Revenge! The aliens turn to Tucker, accusingly Tucker: 'Alright, I'll just go get up on top of the pillar. ''Grif approaches Church in the sand, behind some flashing, buzzing, warning lights '''Grif: '''Uh oh. '''Sarge: Grif, what're you stopping for ah nuts. Simmons: What, there he is. Caboose: 'Oh no, he landed in the middle of the- ''Caboose turns to look at Simmons, remembering Simmons does not know about the minefield. 'Caboose: '...-uh-of of the there. The, the over there. '''Simmons: So, let's get him. Grif: '''Yeah, tell you what Simmons, why don't you go get him? '''Sarge: We'll secure the area here while you retrieve. Simmons: 'Hh, okay I don't have time for this. ''Simmons runs into the minefield and sets one off '''Simmons: Ow! You knew, didn't you. Caboose: Yeah, kinda. Gallery Sarge with Aliens.png Trivia *The episode's title is a reference to American Football; when its "4th and Twenty" only an idiotic coach would do anything other than punt (or kick a field goal if one is close enough). Since the Reds were pinned deep (the proverbial "Twenty Yards") by the other "team" (the Aliens and Blues), they needed to punt "the ball" (Epsilon). * Sarge calling Grif "this yellow guy" is a reference to people mistaking his armor color as yellow. *At 1:24, Sarge references Scooby-Doo by saying the name-sake character's catchphrase, "Ruh-Roh." Video Category:Revelation Category:Episodes